RIDE no :: 155
Sat 10th Oct Banham Outback Station
Hares:: Mr Bossy, Twonk & MoghulMattress
The bashers all gathered at Mr Bossy‘s country home next to their numerous chickens. Drew was seen chasing after the chickens. Why may we ask?? The weather was great and we cycled 35 miles through woods and fields and on the roads. Lunch was at the Angel. A beer stop was followed at the Nag’s Head.
We had the AGPU in the evening at MrBossy’s and had dinner and plenty of beer. MrBossy had to relinquish his title as the Big Wheel and was replaced by Ruth. Ruth came to power and selected Daffodildo with his water gun as her enforcer. Ruth was seen drinking out the infamous nipple and breast cup, and fondling it.
The AGPU was followed by the Norfolk Full Moon Run. We all went to the Cider Shed in Banham, where Naked Ruby, featuring The Man from Uranus and the beautiful (and scantily clad) Las Vague Showgirls performed. After seeing the lovely girls, Daffodildo went poofter and proceeded to lick hairy bearded hashers such as Twonk! After returning to Mr Bossy’s, my memory starts fogging up. I think Daffodildo was passed out in his tent and Pig Farm and Zorro attempted to wake him up, but he refused to drink anymore!! Or did I get my facts mixed up???? The next morning, we all did the Norfolk hash run. Daffodildo got a down down for his licking abilities, Zorro for being a Yank (is that a sin?), and Pig Farm for some unknown reason.
On!On!
Zorro
more . . .
We gathered at Mr & Mrs Bossy’s homestead on a fine, bright autumnal morning. It was tranquil apart from the clucking of the chickens behind the electrified fence. Mr Bossy was not clucking as he was still out setting the trail. It was left to Umplebum (beep beep) to read the ‘Mr Bossy predeparture missive’ of several pages, which confused new and old bashers alike. Only a short way through it Umplebum decided its best use was for bbq kindling and we set onoff.
Over fields and tracks, through forest, under railways and over bridges we went, onon and further onon. Scenic though it was, by 2.00pm the pack was getting restless and thirsty when would we get some ale? Just as my cuisses** were really starting to hurt the heavenly sight of the Angel Inn appeared. An anxious hare looked relieved that we had managed the trail so far.
After being watered and fed and having basked in the glorious sunshine, Mr Bossy cajoled the pack into setting off once again with assurances that it was only 67 miles onin. To keep rehydrated we stopped 2 miles later in East Harling to wet our whistles. While we downed our drinks Mr McDrunk at the bar deliberated on and enlightened us on the finer points of rugby and football.
Mr Bossy then led the way across the fields and onin, laying more flour from his sandcastle bucket as we went. Onin came at a perfect time for me, as after 28.3 miles I was pooped.
The GM (for the final time) disappeared to ‘write his speech for the circle’ and came back some time later with several sheets of paper that he could not read as he had been drinking the delumptious cider. After delivering his address which we failed to comprehend (something about ‘barstriculations’, ‘imitable’ stuff and Bossy ‘masinations’), the new committee was duly elected with the firm tacklechecking hand of Stroof at the helm.
We mainly did lots of eating of venison chilli, drinking of beer and cider and jumping into the jacuzzi in various stages of undress. When the alcohol stakes started to run low the not so faintofheart repaired to the local hostelery for more imbibing and mainly drinking stuff.
Thanks to Mr & Mrs Bossy for their hospitality and a great day. Good luck to the new committee.
** a French word!
On!On!
UBend
Leave a Reply